Jul 15, 2014
Jul 7, 2014
You were tired and nervous, reacting in a way that hurt the feelings of your child. What should you do in such situation?
You’ve just come home from work,
nervous and exhausted. Your child wants to do something, but you harshly say
NO! The child tries to explain why he wants to do it, but you simply don’t want
to listen. Has such a situation ever happened to you, when you’re torn between
so many duties in the office and other responsibilities, that you start to yell
at your child for a trivial thing when you finally get home? Frankly, it
happened to me on several occasions.
People say that the things the child
remember most from their childhood are your failures and certain mistakes. That is true. Therefore, try to control your behavior, act
positively, and give good examples to your child. Don’t let them have a pocket
full of bad memories.
Don’t try to justify yourself with
lame excuses for not being able to listen to their stories. How many times have
we heard from others they lead a pretty hard life, that they’re constantly
struggling with the lack of money, or similar things. It can all be true, it
can be something that troubles and prevents us from being perfect parents. But,
your justifications won’t work with your children. Only other parents can really
understand what you are going through. They would nod, cluck, and confirm
everything you say, since all of you share the same problems. However, whose
love and understanding you need more, of those other parents and people, or of
your children?
Therefore, you should be aware how
important is to apologize to your kid for any mistakes you make (we all make
them). Saying “I’m sorry” can mean a lot in the situation when your child is
sitting in the corner in his room alone and sad (and in my case, angry), where
you have just sent him because he wanted to tell you something incredibly
important (for him, at least ). If you skip to apologize and comfort yourself
with the thought how your parents did the same thing when you were young, (“and
now there’s nothing wrong with you”), you will endanger future relationship
with your child. There is a possibility to repeat the same mistake more than
once. Thus, when your child comes to you with a scratch on his knee, believing
he has a good reason for your attention, don’t turn away your head, saying you
fell million times as a child, asking him to stop acting like a baby. Or one
night, when you get home exhausted, still having a lot of work to do, and he
interrupts you with some very important and urgent issue, be patient. Don’t say
something like “For goodness sake, leave me alone and get back into your
room!”, although you would feel like it.
Similar situations may happen
several times until your child stops communicating with you. No one will ever
ask you anything or disturb you. You will have plenty of time to work or do
whatever you like. However, this might not be good. You will shut that small
door that leads to your child. That door isn’t small at all. In fact it’s the
biggest door you’ll struggle not to close, for your lifetime
So the next time you fall into this
“trap”, don’t forget about your little one to whom you are the whole world.
Think how he might feel and don’t make any excuses saying that he will forget
everything eventually.
Children can forget words and events, but they will
never forget how they felt in certain situations, especially if they were hurt
by your actions. Thus, go back to your child, hug him and say magical “I’m
sorry!” Then, explain him what was the cause of your reaction, and let him to
tell you what he wanted. If the child is angry and refuses to communicate,
tickle him, tell him something that will make him laugh, or find some other way
to cheer him up. You should also be prepared to accept his criticism. My kids,
for instance, never miss the opportunity to tell me how rude I was
(My post on NDF Blog)
Jul 4, 2014
Road-trip with baby
Summer come! Lot of family are prepare for holiday. Bab's first holiday,
for herself, doesn't have any significance, but I believe that pressure on
parents is almost on maximum. How travel will pass, will baby feel nice in new
environment...
How to make road-trip easier for mom
and dad:
Car seat
Car seat is necessary! If you don't have it, you can borrow it from your
friends, because road-trip in it, for kid and you, will be more simply. Before
trip, check one more, is it adequate instal.
More is better
For difference by regular
recommendations for adults, for babies and toddlers recommendation is- More
stuff is better! Especially, if this is first time out-home-for-few-days for
you and your kid. Better is to return lot of unused things, then searching for
something in strange town (you don't know where to find it!).
Timing
My experience- at night! Night can
be problem because of dark and temperature changes in dawn, but kid will sleep
all the way. We usually depart around midnight, and arrive about 7 AM. It is
easier for me to walk by the sea, waiting for arranging room, than fighting
with nervous kid in car. I believe this is easier for kids, too. One time we
make mistake (last summer) and never more, unless this "small one"
grown up.
Toys for trip
Unless you are supporter of night-trip, you go on short trip or simply you
don't want to risk with waking in car (kids), put toys next to car seat. It
should be soft toys, so they can't hurt kid if you by suddenly stop the car.
Extra mirror
I planned to buy this (few times), but till now, i didn't. And I think it's
a great idea, especially when only one adult go on road trip with kids. With
this you'll less turn your head to supervise kids. Instal extra mirror next to
"regular" one, and position it well. If your baby is very young, and
is turn to back of the car, then you can put one more mirror. Baby will have
fun, you will be calm.
First aid
Small toiletry bag with things like dry and wet wipes, few Pampers (if you
need it), some plastic bags, painkillers...I suppose that you have First aid
kit in trunk.
Medications
About this, I'm pretty thoroughly. Where ever we go, only pharmacies are
better equipped. Cream for insect bites, cream for allergies, antibiotic cream,
antipyretic drugs (thermometer), painkillers, probiotics, herbal spray for
throat, nose spray….
Food, drink
By parents choice and kids wishes,
but water is the best solution. Drink must be in bottle, so please, don't
choose no-spill cups, because you can
spill liquid when you pour into it.
Psychic prepare
This is only road-trip, and it will last only couple of
hours, and you and your kids will beautiful spend that time. Most of all, they
will sleep, and you will have time for rest. If kids became nervous, you can
make as many pauses as you want. No need to hurry!
Jun 30, 2014
Seasonal Allergies
When I hear sneezing in serial
after my son waking up, I know the spring and worm weather are come. Since his
third year, he use anti-allergy
therapy when problematic season start. And nothing change, only salvation is
autumn and less pollen in air.
Seasonal allergies or seasonal
allergic rhinitis are bunch of allergy symptoms that occurs during same periods
every year. In that time trees, grass and weeds release pollen in air. Pollen
count is higher in the morning and during warm, dry, breezy days, and lower in
chilly and wet days. The immune system of people with who is allergic on
pollen, treat pollen like attacker and realise some chemicals (histamine) in
bloodstream. In that way, body fight with pollen, and then you get your
allergies symptoms.
People could be allergies on few
different type of pollen and spores. Usually, according timing of symptoms
appearing you can assess what kind of allergy is about.
Kids can develop allergies later
in life, no matter they don't have it on birth (my son "got" allergy
when he was 3 years old). It can happen when kid is 10 years old, and the
symptoms can increase with kids growing up. Sure, genetic predispositions are
miriacle, so I wasn't surprised when Vuk's allergy shows up. In the other hand, it's possibly that with
growing up allergy become weaker, and stop at some moment.
Symptoms
If your kid get cold at the same
period every year, you can blame seasonal allerens for that. Symptoms, which
usaully came on suddenly and last as long as a person is exposed to allergen, can
include:
- sneezing
- itchy nose and/or throat
- nasal congestion
- clear, runny nose
- coughing
With this you can get itching,
watery and/or red eyes, which is called allergic conjunctivitis. Vuk is already
used to that, so when it happen, he by himself wash eyes with clear water.
After that itching and redness stop. Also, he very well knows that he can't
touch weeds, because he most react on weeds pollen.
If your child has wheezing and shortness of
breath in addition to these symptoms, pay attention, because the allergy may
have progressed into asthma.
Diagnosis
If
you suspect that your kid has seasonal allergy, talk to his doctor. To be sure
that it is allergy, you can do skin-test to your kid. It's not so good, because
you traumatize kid, and next year kid can be allergic on some other allergen
(it's changeable). So, if your kid don't have some dramatic problems, try to
delay skin-testing with decreasing symptoms, until the chile is 7 years old.
Treatment
There's
no magic cure for seasonal allergies, it's possible just to allay symptoms.
Start with reducing exposure to allergens. During the season keep windows
closed, use air-condition, and stay in house while pollen count is high. And
now, please, let somebody tells me: How to keep my son in house, while his
friends play soccer on meadow in a summer? No way! He go out, and when he came
back, I put him in a shower and clothes go in washing machine. We wash nose
with saline, and that's it!
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